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Sunday, March 15, 2020

desolation

Opening Prayer: How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?
     Look on me and answer, Lord my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death, and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
     But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the Lord’s praise, for he has been good to me. (Psalm 13:1-6, NIV)

Scripture: Psalm 13:1-6

Journal: What do you do when it seems like God is nowhere to be found?  What and how do you pray?  How do the words of this ancient prayer offer you hope, or challenge?  How is God asking you to trust him today, even in those areas of life where it is hard to see exactly what he is up to?

Reflection:

canyon

standing at the base of the canyon
looking up
how immense the walls
towering far above
and how deep the floor
dark and hopeless
it seems an impossible climb
out of this pit of sadness
groaning and despair
how can i possibly reach the other side
where life can continue
once again?

how can i do this?
i cry into the chasm
how can i do this?
it just doesn’t seem possible

i need someone
who knows the way
through the pain and darkness
the despair and loneliness
back to life again
who could possibly know the way?
only one who has been there
who has been to the depths
and made it back alive
only one who has seen rock bottom
and survived even still

i need someone who knows the way
and can walk beside me
through the darkest night
back into the light again

only you can offer hope
you alone
hold the possibility
that in spite of all the pain
life can one day begin again
only you can offer hope
that the canyon rim
can someday be reached

only you know the way
so reach down
from on high
and take hold
of this broken heart
reach down
to the bottom of this abyss
and lift me up
take me
in your strong and tender arms
and make my shattered life
whole once again
Pieces by Jim Branch

Author’s Note:  I wrote this years and years ago in the midst of some of the deepest groaning I could ever imagine.  And as I read it again, 25 years later,  I realize that you do eventually get to the other side of the canyon; life does return to "normal" again, but it is an entirely "new normal" as one of my dear friends, who knows the depths of the groan, likes to say.  What stands out to me most on this side of it all...is gratitude.  Jackson, I am so incredibly grateful for the gift of our few days together...and what God did in me (us) as a result.

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Long enough, God—you’ve ignored me long enough. I’ve looked at the back of your head long enough. Long enough I’ve carried this ton of trouble, lived with a stomach full of pain. Long enough my arrogant enemies have looked down their noses at me.
     Take a good look at me, God, my God; I want to look life in the eye, so no enemy can get the best of me or laugh when I fall on my face.
     I’ve thrown myself headlong into your arms—I’m celebrating your rescue. I’m singing at the top of my lungs, I’m so full of answered prayers. (Psalm 13:1-6, The Message)

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