judas

Opening Prayer: Lord Jesus, I am such a mess.  Please forgive me for being so much less than the person and the lover you made me to be.  By your power and your grace and your love, transform my heart and change my life, so that I can love fully and completely, the way you deserve to be loved.  Amen.

Scripture: John 12:1-8

Journal: Who are you most like in this story?  Why?  Who do you long to be like?  How do you get there?

Reflection: So as the scene unfolds, we find ourselves at a dinner given in Jesus’ honor.  What a great place to be, right?  After all, it’s such a festive atmosphere; Lazarus is alive again and Jesus is the one responsible for it!  It’s time to celebrate.

     With Lazarus reclining at the table and Martha serving—some things never change—Mary enters the room with a jar of expensive perfume and empties the entirety of its contents on Jesus’ feet, and then wipes his feet with her hair.  It is such an intimate and beautiful expression of extravagant love!  The fragrance of her affection filling the air and intoxicating all of the guests.

     All except Judas, that is.  He sees this incredible expression of love and affection, and instead of enjoying its beauty, he objects to it.  He’s so focused on himself, and how everything affects him and his own little world, that he cannot celebrate.  He can only criticize. 

     Sound familiar?  It does to me.  As much as I long to be like Mary in this story—or even being like Martha would be preferable—I often tend to be most like Judas.  I see someone doing a beautiful thing and instead of being able to appreciate it and celebrate it, my insecurities rise up and get the best of me.  I somehow see this beautiful expression of love as some kind of threat to my own worth and value, so I criticize.  I compare.  I jockey for position.  I spin a story in my own head about what is really going on in the heart of the giver that makes me feel better about myself.  Lord, have mercy.

     I am so glad it is Holy Week.  I am such a mess and in such desperate need of all that will happen this week, as well as the next.  There is so still so much in me that needs to die.  There is still so much in me that needs to be raised up to new life again.  There’s still so much of me that needs to be nailed to the cross of Jesus and left there.

     O Lord Jesus, please forgive me for being like Judas.  By your power, your love, and your grace, please make me more like Mary, this day and every day.  Amen.  

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Forgive me, Lord Jesus, for being like Judas.  Please make me more like Mary, this day and every day.  Amen.

an invitation to holy week

Opening Prayer:

O Christ Jesus
When all is darkness
And we feel our weakness and helplessness,
Give us the sense of Your Presence,
Your Love and Your Strength.
Help us to have perfect trust
In Your protecting love
And strengthening power,
So that nothing may frighten or worry us,
For, living close to You,
We shall see Your Hand,
Your Purpose, Your Will through all things.

~St. Ignatius

Scripture: Luke 19:28-44

Journal: Where have you seen new life spring forth from death?  What still needs to die in you that room might be made for new life?  What is Jesus’ invitation to you during holy week?

Reflection:

a long season of lent is finally coming to an end

but the beginning of the end involves a ride

a ride into the depths of death and dying

a painful but necessary journey

for a dying must take place

in order to make room for new life

in the kingdom of God

death always leads to new life

and so Jesus turns to each of us and asks

will you ride with me?

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Lord Jesus, give me the grace and the strength and the courage to join you once again on your journey to the cross, whatever that may mean.  Amen.

lessons in irrelevance

Opening Prayer: Only you, O God, only you.  Let that phrase sink into the deepest places of my heart and soul, so that I can live my life from its truth and its beauty.  Amen.

Scripture: Psalm 62:1-12

Journal: How can embracing your irrelevance help you to move from God and to God alone?  How can it free you up and empower you to be all that God desires you to be?  How is God asking you to trust in him today instead of yourself?

Reflection:  Okay, so I’m a bit of a slow learner.  I have been praying Psalm 62 every Wednesday for three years now and it is finally starting to get through to me, especially when you add this odd season of being homebound due to the coronavirus outbreak.

     Here’s what I am learning:  I am irrelevant.  And by that I do not mean that I am not relevant and valuable to God; I mean I am not necessary for the survival of the world.  God can manage just fine without me.  If nothing else, the last few weeks of being stuck at home has convinced me that I am not essential to the health and well-being of those I know and love.  Sure, I add something unique and beautiful to their lives, but the truth is that when I’m not around they seem to get along just fine.  And interestingly enough, that is not meant to be morbid or demeaning, it is meant to be freeing and empowering—for both me and them.  

     You’d have thought I would have learned this lesson by now, simply through praying Psalm 62.  But again, I’m a bit of a slow learner.  The very first words (in the original Hebrew) of the psalm are “Only for God.”  It is the theme of the entire psalm—only for God, only in God, only through God.  There is no God and, just God alone.  And for someone who tries to be relevant every day of his life, that is a bit of a blow to my ego.  I want to be relevant and necessary.  What’s more, I need to be relevant and necessary.  So for someone who needs to be needed, it is a humbling reality.  I guess God is trying to teach me the value of being irrelevant.  I guess he is trying to get me to recognize and embrace that irrelevance, rather than deny and resist it.

     There’s an old saying that goes: “If I need you, then I cannot truly love you.”  Until I can release my need to be relevant and impactful, life will always be about me, not about God.  And God works in and through me best when it is all about him and is nothing about me.  So somehow, mysteriously, it is only through embracing my irrelevance that I am actually able to be relevant to what God wants to do in and through me in his kingdom.  I suppose I would do well to remember than.

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Forgive me, O God, when I trust in myself rather than trusting in you.  When I do that I only get in the way of what you desire to do in and around me.  Amen.

if you are willing

Opening Prayer: Lord Jesus, teach me how to pray.  Thank you that you can do all things.  Give me the strength and the courage and the grace to ask, like the leper, if you are willing.  And help me to fully accept whatever answer you may give, knowing that you love me deeply and will care for me fully, at all times and in all ways.  Thank you that, regardless of my circumstances, I can fully trust in you.  Amen.

Scripture: Mark 1:40-45

Journal: What are you begging God for these days?  How are you praying for that particular person, thing, or circumstance?  What has been God’s answer thus far?  How would “if you are willing” change the nature of your prayers?  What do you think God is up to in that?

Reflection: A man with leprosy came to him and begged on his knees, “If you are willing, you can make me clean.” (Mark 1:40) 

     Okay, I have to be honest, I’ve never been a big “name it, claim it” type of guy when it comes to prayer.  That mentality just seems to be a lot more about “my will be done” than it does about “Thy will be done.”  I think that’s why I love this scene in Mark’s gospel so much.  It is such a great example of how to come humbly and submissively before the throne of God with a desperate plea. 

     This needy, hurting, broken man comes to Jesus, falls on his knees, and begs for healing.  But it is the way he does it that I love.  I love his posture, I love his request, and I love how Jesus responds.  It offers such a great image for prayer.  It makes me wonder if Jesus would be really pleased if we all approached him in this way.  It was raw and passionate and real, yet held no demand.  It carried no sense of entitlement or obligation.  And it did not seem to be wrought with a sense of trying to manipulate God into doing what the leprous man wanted.  It was simply a broken person, in great need, falling on his knees before the God who made him, and begging that God to intervene on his behalf—if he was willing.  That is the key.

     “I know you can,” states the requestor.  “That is, if you are willing to.”  Almost as if to say: “I know you can, O God.  I know you are able.  I know you have the power to help.  But I need to ask, in your great wisdom, if you are willing.”  What a great prayer!  It puts the ball clearly in God’s court.  It leaves our circumstances completely under his control and care.  It reminds us that it is his will that counts the most, not our own.  No one knew this better than Jesus: “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42)  And Paul had the same experience when he pleaded with the Lord to take away his “thorn in the flesh,” but the only response he received was: “My grace is sufficient for you.” (2 Cor. 12:9) 

     Years ago I had the privilege, with a group of friends, to sit under the teaching of a wise and wonderful man; a man who was well into his nineties and had been following Jesus for over seventy years.  He was intimately familiar with the ways and the practices of prayer.  During one of our sessions together, one of my friends asked him to describe his prayer life, and I will never forget what he said.  Part of his answer had to do with how he prayed for certain things and people.  “When someone asks me to pray for something,” he said, “I don’t immediately begin praying for exactly what they asked me to, I take it to the Lord first and ask him how he wants me to pray for that person or circumstance.  Then, after I have received an answer from the Lord, I pray.  That way I am able to pray in line with his will, not merely the will of the one who had asked me to pray.” 

     And there you have it.  “If you are willing, you can make me clean,” said the man who was covered with leprosy.  And Jesus’ response was priceless: “I am willing.  Be clean!”  Thanks be to God.

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Lord God, keep my heart, my life, and my prayers in line with your will, this day and every day.  Amen.

repent and believe

Opening Prayer:  Lord Jesus, thank you that it’s time, the kingdom of God is at hand.  Help me to repent and believe the good news, today and every day.  Amen.

Scripture: Mark 1:14-15

Journal: Which one do you struggle more with, repentance or belief?  How were they meant to be held together?  What is the state of each in your heart and life?  How will you repent and believe the good news this days?

Reflection: “After John was put in prison, Jesus went into Galilee, proclaiming the good news of God.  “The time has come,” he said.  “The kingdom of God is at hand.  Repent and believe the good news.” (Mark 1:14-15)

     “It’s time!  No more delay.  Everything is ripe and ready.  The king has finally entered his kingdom.  Therefore, repent and believe the good news.”  They are the very first words that Mark records of Jesus, so they must be really significant.  And they are not a mere suggestion, but a call. A command.  If you want to be a part of this kingdom, you must repent and believe.

     Repent means to change your mind, your way of thinking.  The Greek word is metanoeō.  It is a combination of two words: meta, which means afterwards, and noeō, which means to think.  Thus, repentance is the call to think differently or afterwards.  Or, in other words, to change the way we think.  It is a key element to following Jesus. When we come to him, we must begin to think like he thinks, which then calls us to live like he lives.

     Believe means “to have faith in something or someone.”  The Greek word is pisteuō, which means to be fully convinced of.  Thus, belief isn’t just what we say we believe, it is what we are most convinced is really true.  Which is best evidenced by the way we live our lives.  What we do will tell us a lot about what we really believe to be true.

     But notice Jesus doesn’t just say either repent or believe, he says repent and believe.  It must always be both.  They are vitally connected to each other, you cannot separate one from the other.  But, unfortunately, we do.  

     Often we try to repent, without really believing, and that is totally useless.  Without belief, without being fully convinced, our change is short-lived at best.  It has no depth or substance or power or rootedness to it.  It is the seed planted in shallow soil.  

     And at other times we might be tempted to think that we can believe, without actually having to repent.  That is equally as useless, and even more dangerous, because it makes us like the Scribes and Pharisees.  When we fall into this way of thinking, we somehow convince ourselves that we have no need of repentance, either because of our own self-righteousness (Matthew 5:20), or because we have somehow convinced ourselves theologically that God no longer requires it (John 8:31-47).  

     But Jesus is very clear: both repentance and belief are necessary and essential to life in his kingdom.  You cannot have one without the other.  It is always a both/and kind of arrangement, not an either/or.  And the sooner we realize that, and embrace these two necessities, the sooner we can live life the way Jesus intended it to be.

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Lord Jesus, repentance and belief are such key parts of life in your kingdom, but I am good at neither.  Have mercy on me, Lord Jesus, and give me the strength and the power and the courage to be able to repent and believe the good news, whatever that may look like and whatever it may cost.  Amen.

blossoming

Opening Prayer:  Thank you, O Lord, for the invitation to return to you.  For only by returning to you—continually—can we become all that we were created to be.  Amen.

Scripture: Hosea 14:1-9

Journal: What does returning to the Lord your God look like in this season of your life?  What is he inviting you to?  Where do you sense something blooming and blossoming within or around you?  Are you able to fully appreciate its beauty?  How is it a beautiful reflection of him?

Reflection: “I will be like dew to Israel; he will blossom like a lily. . . .  He will flourish like the grain.  He will blossom like a vine. . .” (Hosea 14:5, 7) 

     The book of Hosea ends with a simple invitation: “Return, O Israel, to the Lord your God.”  And if we take God up on that invitation, it tells us, in rich imagery, what the results will be: flourishing and blossoming.  If we return to the Lord, we will become all that we were intended to be.  A flower’s entire purpose is to blossom.  It is the culmination of a long and arduous process—and a beautiful one at that.

     Years ago we planted lilies by our mailbox.  When we planted them, we knew that it would take a while for them to bud and bloom and blossom.  For months we would go to the mailbox to get the mail and see nothing, just the barren landscape of winter.  But then one day, suddenly it seemed, the green sprouts poked their heads out of the ground and we were able to watch them grow each day.  It was the first hint we’d had that something was going on under the surface of the soil all of those days and weeks and months.  But once those green shoots finally appeared, the anticipation began to grow, until the day when they finally opened their heads to the sun and blossomed into all they were intended to be.  It wasn’t until then that we were able to fully see and fully appreciate their true beauty.

     And Hosea promises us the same.  He promises us that if we will return to the Lord our God—not just once or twice, but always again—we too will see a day when we become all that he intended for us to be.  We too will bud and blossom and flourish.  We too will show the world the beauty and the majesty that we were meant to reflect.  It is what we were created for.

     Which begs the question: What does returning to the Lord your God look like for you these days?  How is God inviting you to become all that you were intended to be?  And where in your life are you seeing a blossoming?  Where in your life is the Lord growing you into something beautiful and alive and vibrant?

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Thank you, O Lord, that blossoming is exactly what you had in mind for us when you breathed us into being.  You did not have to make us that way, but thank you that you did.  Help us, O Lord, to return to you each and every day, so that we might become all that we were intended to be—beautiful reflections of your life, love, and creativity.  Amen.

waiting

Opening Prayer: O Lord, keep us from doing, just for the sake of doing.  Keep us from springing into action, simply because we have no better alternative.  Keep us from manufacturing and creating, when should be sitting still and depending on you to move and to act.  Keep us from spinning our wheels, just for the sake of spinning them.  We can do nothing apart from you, O Lord, so help us to be still and wait for you.  Amen.

Scripture: Psalm 130:5-6

Journal: What do you think about waiting?  How does it make you feel?  Why are you resistant to it?  How are you embracing it?  What do you think God is up to?

Reflection: I noticed a monk, ski cap pulled over his ears, sitting perfectly still beneath a tree.  There was such reverence in his silhouette, such tranquil sturdiness, that I paused to watch.  He was the picture of waiting.

     Later I sought him out.  “I saw you today sitting beneath the tree---just sitting there so still.  How is it that you can wait so patiently in the moment?  I can’t seem to get used to the idea of doing nothing.”

     He broke into a wonderful grin.  “Well, there’s the problem right there, young lady.  You’ve bought into the cultural myth that when you’re waiting you’re doing nothing.”

     Then he took his hands and placed them on my shoulders, peered straight into my eyes and said, “I hope you’ll hear what I’m about to tell you.  I hope you’ll hear it all the way down to your toes.  When you’re waiting, you’re not doing nothing.  You’re doing the most important something there is.  You’re allowing your soul to grow up.  If you can’t be still and wait, you can’t become what God created you to be.”  (When the Heart Waits by Sue Monk Kidd)

Prayer

Closing Prayer: Lord, help us to know that waiting is not merely doing nothing, but it is doing a very important something.  Therefore, help us to wait on you, O Lord, more than a watchman waits for the morning.  Amen.